Friday, November 6, 2009

November 5 - Day 5

I wrote this post and then went back to proof it and saw something I had not connected. As you will see I had something happen this week that has really tested me. And I talk about it as an opportunity to heal a negative pattern. What I had not connected was the metaphor for the painting. When I saw the words "other shoe" it made me thing of the expression "waiting for the other shoe to drop." THIS IS the old negative pattern. When things start rocking along too smoothly in my life I expect the "other shoe" to drop. Well, it did. I realize stuff happens in life and nobody ever goes through it completely without challenge but living with this constant fear of the "other shoe" dropping IS the thing I am trying to clear up! How weird is that? ha-ha.

That said, I am just amazing myself that I am keeping up this week. Along with the day job I've had something going on pretty much every night. Time last night was really short. I had a lovely visit with my new friend, Marcy, about the paintings she wants. We ended up running some packages to Fed-Ex for her and then stopped for a snack/drink before I headed off to meditation. I'm very excited about this project for her. She wanted something meaningful for her and her husband so I am going to paint 4 vertical canvas that represent something from each season they love to do. Winter will represent skiing in Breckinridge; Spring in Mexico, Summer concerts at Red Rocks and Fall at Austin City Limits concerts. She had some photos for ideas she had pulled out. I enjoy the collaboration and helping someone bring their vision to life.

Meditation was just wonderful. I am so grateful to have found this small group of people. I hear a lot of things I've known for a while, am learning some new things but the great thing is really beginning to practice what I've learned. And this week something came up that has really been testing me. Does anyone else find that to be true? Though I panicked in the moment I am trying accept that this is an opportunity to heal an old and long standing pattern in my life. Yuck. Nobody likes the process but I've had enough experience to know that once you come out on the other side it's worth it.
So all that is just lovely and peachy but I found myself with not much time or energy left at the end of the evening. I did work a bit on the other shoe because I am determined to put some stroke(s) on it every day. I realize I don't have to hold myself to any harsh standard. But it is the "challenge" to create that I have taken on and it will be a little personal victory to follow it through. Besides I am enjoying it so it's not like I am hating or begrudging of it. Tonight will be another night, I suspect, for a few brush strokes and then this weekend I will have more time to devote to it. I'm just excited that my "Muse" has come back to me well rested and energized and ready for this project.

3 comments:

  1. Yay! I'm first to comment!!! I love the shoes!!!! I always love to take pictures of my nephew's shoes (closeups). I know what you mean, I love this proverb "Why throw stones before you when the path is clear?"

    Enjoy AEDM!
    xoxo,
    ja
    http://julieannshahin.blogspot.com

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  2. There's something about empty shoes that I find quite touching. This is a very nice drawing! nancy

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  3. Love the shoes! It's interesting how they have character! Congrats on the commission..four paintings! Cool.

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